People are in fact not stupid or insane.
This took me almost two decades to conclude. In fact I had written off people completely back when I was 10 years of age and focused on only important things such as computers, chess and video games.
It took me until high school before I figured that I would have to get along with people and that they weren’t all bad. But it was only a few years ago that I decided that people are in fact not stupid or insane.
This may sound like a strange thing to say, but I believe a lot of people today have this opinion about people they disagree with or don’t understand.
“You’re stupid. Why would you believe that?”
“Only an insane person would agree with you.”
I can guarantee to you that there are some people you disagree with or hate and have in the past dismissed them as stupid or insane. Just because you don’t understand them doesn’t make them these things. Of course, it doesn’t make them right either. But being right is a completely different issue.
Terming somebody stupid or insane or some other perjorative is in fact a personal abdication of trying to understand the other person. Because if you could get in their shoes and understand where they’re coming from, then it would make perfect sense why they are the way they are. Not everyone has the time or the interest to understand other people, so accepting that someone is stupid is a good terminator and that line of thought and lets you go back to living your life.
I try to understand people every day, especially people that are a complete opposite of me. How does someone come to the point where they believe things this way and not the other? Why do they act in this way when it is more sensible and in their best interest to act another way?
I usually ask a lot of questions of people, but I rarely comment on what I’m thinking. This is because some of the conclusions I make will be misinterpreted and people will take offense. But this is a silly reason since one of the things I’ve learned is that someone somewhere on the internet will always take offense.
Another reason I have been reluctant to talk about it is that people will misinterpret my analysis as validation or legitimizing one person’s belief or action pattern. In fact, in the course of my thought, I have been downright empathetic to some very despicable people in the past. This is not to say that I agree with their actions, but I can see how everything they did at the time seemed very sensible and the Right Thing To Do.
So what I want to do over the next few blog posts is discuss a particular type of person and go through my analysis of how they see the world and why they believe and act the way they do. This is not really psychology or psychiatry. I think it is more inline with the art of diplomacy, trying to understand the person across from you and attempting to come to an agreement.
This should be fun.